Finding the Joy In Our Hard Times As Moms

wisewomanSomedays, life is just plain old DIFFICULT! I’ve had days that start off with kids that were up sick all night, and peed their beds, peed my bed, peed on my husband’s back! HAHA! I bet he will love that I wrote that.  The day starts off cruddy, the house is a mess, you’re behind on laundry, your kids are tired and sick, you’re exhausted.  If you’re reading this and you’re a momma then you know exactly what I’m talking about. Being a mom is tough.  Top that off with being a wife, a friend, a daughter, a role model for your kids, the keeper of your home, the grocery shopper, and all of the other tasks that pile on top of us everyday.  LIFE.IS.TOUGH.SOMETIMES.

A few weeks ago I was sick, the stomach bug was slowly making it’s way to each person in our house.  I can handle sick kids, I can handle puke, I can handle poop, I can handle fevers, but when I get sick then everything really starts to crumble.  The house was seriously destroyed, I had piles of laundry because my kids had been sick, threw up in their beds, peed the bed, oh, and  the bathroom…..I didn’t even want to step foot in it.   Can you say…NIGHTMARE?! It was tough, these are the things we go through as moms.  No one ever said parenting was easy.  In this, I remember asking God to be my strength because I had none.  I hadn’t the strength to even get off the couch.

The next day I was feeling a little better.  As I was just starting to attempt my laundry pile, I started crying.  I was sleep deprived, still not feeling well, and overwhelmed.  I sat on my floor and cried, then cried out to God.  He promises us strength, He promises that HIS strength is made perfect in our weakness.  He promises to never leave us, He promises us joy, peace, hope, love.  I needed Him. Badly.

As I stood up, even though I still had this mountain of laundry (mostly pee and puke, just what I wanted to deal with) I thought of the scripture “whatsoever you do, do it heartily as unto the Lord”  Here’s the thing ladies….we will ALWAYS have obstacles, we will always have expectations on us, we will always have hardships at times, we will always have dirty laundry and dinners to make, but when you embrace the mindset of doing it unto God, you will find delight and joy in it.  You’ll find peace in it, happiness in it, hope in it. The joy of the Lord will be your strength.

I’m going to scrub my floors, why? Because I am a wife and I am called to be the keeper of my home.  So because God has called me to that, I will do that because I love Him.  We can groan and complain about how hard things are, my husband always tells me that complaining takes an unpleasant situation and makes it even more unpleasant.  It’s true.  When we do things unto the Lord, it takes the expectation off, it makes things more pleasant, it lightens our load.  We set the tone for our homes.  When my husband and kids get home from school, if I am in a bad mood, it sets everyone else up to have a bad attitude also.  “A wise woman builds her house, a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands” Proverbs 14:1.  Have you ever been whacked with the thought of that?  The potential that you hold as a woman to build or tear down your home?  How grievous to consider the thought that I have the potential to tear down my home. We build and tear down with our words, our actions, our thoughts, our reactions, our time.

So I asked myself this….because I set the tone for my home and I have the ability to either build it or tear it down, what is it that I desire in my home? Do I desire a jubilant and happy home? A sweet, rich and loving marriage? Children who follow Jesus and are permeated by His love, wisdom and grace?  I will set the tone for this to happen in my home.  I set that tone by being patient, loving, joyful, peaceful. How can we do that?  We abide in God, we LIVE in His strength.  His Spirit gives us joy, peace, love, goodness, kindness, gentleness, patience.  We can’t do it apart from Him.  In our own strength we are impatient, bitter, annoyed, and harsh.   In our pursuit of having a fruitful marriage and children who love and obey God, we must realize that we must first pursue God.  We must first surrender to Him, we must do our work unto Him.  In this, you will find peace unimaginable, you’ll find His agape love that captivates us, and you’ll find joy that is overflowing.  YOU, my dear sister, have the ability to build your house! and YOU have the ability to tear yours down.  If you have torn it down, guess what? His mercies are new every morning.  They are new today! You can still build your house.

 

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Comments

  1. Courtney Hoffman says:

    Thank you for that post, Marissa. It
    came at just the right time. I have been struggling with being so overwhelmed for a few weeks now. Between taking care of my own children, other peoples children, trying to spend time with my husband and trying to keep my housework taken care of, most days I feel like crying myself. Lol. The Lord reminds me though that He has me right where He wants me and I need to work unto Him and not men. To be thankful for all my blessings even when times are stressful. We really can find peace in Him alone. Great post. God bless you. All of your boys are so lucky to have you.
    Your sister in Christ,
    Courtney

    • Courtney, Thanks for commenting! You are in that tough season with a newborn and I’m sure you are sleep deprived 🙂 I’m sure all of us moms are. I’m trying to decide if the circles under my eyes are from lack of sleep or if I am just getting older! There is such a balance to everything when you have little ones, and I am thankful to have our Shepherd leading us and teaching us that balance. “He tends His flock like shepherd; He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart; He gently leads those that have young.” Isaiah 40:11. He will lead you Courtney, He promises us that! You’re doing a great job, and you’re right, He has you right where He wants you. It’s a hard season but focus on the blessings in it. I’ll be praying for you 🙂

  2. Love this and needed to hear it. I just posted on fb about wanting to go to my room and cry, lol. I need a change in attitude. Thanks

    • Jocie….No doubt that we all go through mountains and valleys. We have many expectations on us a mothers, and they get overwhelming when we look at them. I fight and kick when I’m in the valleys!! lol. But there are blessings in those valleys, meaningful lessons that God is trying to teach us. He puts us in these seasons. Sometimes, they are not long seasons. Sometimes, we go through just a rough day. I always ask God what He wants to teach me through it and sometimes, it is like you said, that we just need to have an attitude change. I can relate, every mom probably can! Let the Joy of the Lord be our strength , and remember He has a beautiful and divine purpose for you in the lives of your children and your husband. I am praying for you 🙂

  3. “Because I am called to be the keeper of my home” this is what I will be writing on my refrigerator to remind me and give me the strength to keep on when I feel like giving up or when things get rough. Thank you for your inspirational words.

    • Marissa says:

      Jennifer, Thanks for stopping by! I checked out your site also, lots of awesome stuff!! Thanks for commenting 🙂

  4. What a beautiful and encouraging post. We all have moments like these but it’s finding the Grace, through Christ to be strengthened and serve the ones we love. “… the keeper of my home” – I love that!

    Thank you so much for sharing (and for linking up to the SHINE Blog Hop).

    Wishing you a lovely day.
    xoxo

    • Marissa says:

      Jennifer, I just popped over to your site. I love it. When you said each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children, I stopped for a second and thought about that. It’s very true. I pray that those memories are ones that God will be pleased with and that our children will grow spiritually from! Thanks for a great post, and thanks for stopping by!

  5. This was a great post. This also looks like a great place to stop and visit for awhile. I hope to stop back in every now and then. Thanks!!

  6. This is such a challenge to me. Thanks for these words!