I come from an Italian family. I remember my grandfather saying, even if your mother is wrong, she still is never wrong. We fight to the death over things, because it is hard to mutter those despicable words “I was wrong”. I avoid those words at all costs! I’m joking…..sort of. But who wants to be wrong? I sure don’t, and I’m sure you don’t either. This week, I did something that my husband asked me not to do. Why? Because I thought my way was better than his. (I’m still contemplating whether it WAS still better). Do you want to know what the end result was? FAILURE, CATASTROPHE, and ANGER. The first two things you would expect. Yes it failed, but why the anger? I got angry that my husband asked me not to do something, and in the spur of the moment I told him it’s his fault that it didn’t work because he vexed me by telling me not to do it (even though it was a good idea). I have to laugh at myself now. I blamed him for something that didn’t work because he asked me not to do it. Looking back I am wondering if I was just having a hormonal moment and not thinking clearly.
I couldn’t admit that I was wrong. I HATED that it didn’t work, and I was furious. Here is the root of the problem….PRIDE. I was too prideful to admit that my idea was not the best. I was too prideful to tell someone else that they were right, and I was W.R.O.N.G! Wrong with a capital W! I still get flustered when I think about it. What about you? When your husband tells you to do or not to do something, what if you have a “better” idea? Can you admit that you are wrong? I hate to mutter those horrible words “I am wrong”.
“Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice” Proverbs 13:10
Did you hear that? PRIDE BREEDS QUARRELS. Wow, is that true! I think a lot of marriages struggle because neither spouse is willing to say “I was wrong”. Instead they go on being annoyed with each other, and gripping the fact that they think the other person was wrong. We are called to be submissive. The Bible doesn’t say “be submissive only if you think your husband has a good idea” It says to be submissive!
Here is the thing ladies, your husband’s idea may stink, it may not be the best one, and it may drive you nuts. When you love God and serve Him, he will give you the ability to JOYFULLY submit. Without Him, you’ll find yourself in the same position I was in, angry, and unwilling to say you were wrong. We are called to help our husbands, to serve alongside them, to be the keeper of our homes NOT the head of our homes, to cherish them, and to be humble in our role.
God is always working in us, He equips us to be a joy-filled wife who sets the tone for our homes to be joyful also.